I am a Specialist Professional for Couple Therapy, Addiction and Co-dependency issues. I integrate my therapy combining many modalities to suit the needs of the clients using Person Centred , Transactional Analysis, Psychodynamic, Gestalt, Brief Therapy, CBT and Motivational Interviewing where appropriate.
The Types of Therapy I Practice:
I bring my Specialised Training alongside my own experiences to facilitate couples struggling with being in a marriage/relationship and what can sometimes seem like impossible problems to solve. I use the Gottman Method and other approaches to help improve verbal communication which also covers the following:-
Criticism Dealing with problems through harsh, blaming, or hurtful expressions of judgment or disapproval. • Focus is on perceived personal flaws rather than changeable behaviours. • Often met with defensiveness. “This kitchen is a mess. You’re such a slob.” Defensiveness Deflecting responsibility for your own mistakes and behaviours, or refusing to accept feedback. • Making excuses for behaviour. • Shifting blame to your partner. “It isn't my fault I yelled. You were late, not me!” Contempt Showing anger, disgust, or hostility toward your partner. • Using putdowns or insults. • Acting superior to your partner. • Using a mocking or sarcastic tone. Stonewalling Emotionally withdrawing, shutting down, or going silent during important discussions. • Often a response to feeling overwhelmed. • Used to avoid difficult discussions or problems. • Underlying problems go unresolved. Antidotes are skills that replace each of the four horsemen. These skills help resolve conflict and encourage positive feelings between partners. Antidotes Gentle Start-up Dealing with problems in a calm and gentle way. The focus is on the problem—not the person. • Save the discussion for an appropriate time. • Use warm body language and tone of voice. • Use “I” statements. “I feel frustrated when dirty dishes are left in the sink. Could you please do the dishes tonight?” Take Responsibility Own up to your behaviour without blaming others. • Avoid taking feedback personally. • Use feedback as an opportunity to improve. • Show remorse and apologize. “I shouldn't have raised my voice. I’m sorry.” Share Fondness & Admiration Foster a healthy relationship by regularly showing each other respect and appreciation. • Show affection. • Recognize your partner’s strengths. • Give compliments. Use Self-Soothing Use relaxation techniques to calm down and stay present with your partner. • Agree to pause the conversation briefly. • Use deep breathing. • Use progressive muscle relaxation (PMR).
Person Centred: A non-directive approach which believes in your ability to make the right choices and your potential to find the best solutions and make the appropriate changes needed in your life. Person-centred counselling was first developed in the 1940s and 1950s by Carl Rogers. It is one of the most widely practiced forms of therapy in the world today. It works on the belief that given the right conditions, each person has the ability to change and move in the direction of a more fulfilling and satisfying way of living by trusting their inner resources to find their own answers and direction. When the client learns to fully understand how they interact with the world around them and how they experience themselves in relation to the world, they gain greater self-awareness and acceptance, which empowers them to make their own choices and take control over their own lives. The client has the capacity, within the safety of a therapeutic counselling relationship, to begin this process of healing or change.
Transactional Analysis (TA): Helps to explain why we think, feel and behave in the way we do. Developed by psychiatrist Eric Berne, it is a form of modern psychology that examines a person's relationships and interactions. It involves a set of practical conceptual tools designed to promote personal growth and change and can help individuals to reach their full potential in all aspects of life.
Gestalt Therapy: A highly positive and practical integrative therapeutic approach which helps clients focus on their immediate thoughts, feelings and behaviour and to better understand the way they relate to others - helping them find a new perspective or see the bigger picture. Role play is often used to aid the resolution of past conflicts and this can be especially beneficial when working with bereavement. I continue to attend seminars, conventions, and retreats to learn more about how people think! I am passionate about healthy change and of-course I do want to be a great therapist!
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) CBT aims to help people become aware of when they make negative interpretations, and of behavioural patterns which reinforce the distorted thinking. Cognitive therapy helps people to develop alternative ways of thinking and behaving which aims to reduce their psychological distress. Cognitive behavioural therapy is, in fact, an umbrella term for many different therapies that share some common elements. Two of the earliest forms of Cognitive behavioural Therapy were Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT), developed by Albert Ellis in the 1950s, and Cognitive Therapy, developed by Aaron T. Beck in the 1960s.
My Training And Work Experience Also Covers:
Being a family member of an addict
Bereavement and loss
Isolation and loneliness
Living with chronic illness
Loss of direction
Loss of meaning
Mental health issues
Major life changes
Work related issues
I continue to attend seminars, conventions, and retreats to learn more about how people think! I am passionate about healthy change and of-course I do want to be a great therapist!